I twittered about this earlier this morning. While I'm on the subject, Happy Turkey Day to fellow Americans, and Happy Thursday to everyone else.
There's an exercise that someone I trust recommended that I do. As it was described to me, I was totally turned off. It sounded like some bullshit from "The Secret" or whatever. But, because I value this individual's opinion, I'm willing to give it a shot. So, here goes. For a while I'll be quoting from my paraphrasing of Sonorous's writing.
"I'm talking about writing out an Ideal Woman Script, listing every qualification that you want in a woman, completely letting go of all attachments and aversions to it, and then allowing her to come into your life.
So, how do you do this? Simple, really. Do not overcomplicate the simple.
1. Put three categories of qualifications down: Be (Is), Do (Can And Loves To), Have (Has).
Be specific about what you want. I’m talking extremely specific. List character traits, backgrounds, interests, passions, sexual desires, everything that you want. Hold nothing back. This is, after all, your list.
2. After you finish it, look at it until you stop caring about it. You can do this with releasing, EFT, meditation, or just do what I did when I was younger and didn’t know anything about any of these: Just forget about it to the point where you genuinely have no attachments and no aversions to it. Make it something that you play with, something that you look at and say “Wow. That would be awesome to have a woman with all of these traits, but if it doesn’t happen, that’s cool, too.”
This non-attachment, a true not caring, is vitally important. I won’t go into details, but suffice it to say that if you have attachments (or aversions) to your list at all, like I did when I finally discovered what I was doing and tried to replicate it with said attachments, and you draw in a woman who meets some of your qualifications, you’ll be attached to her (and thus averse to losing her), too. Bad news for all involved.
That’s it. Two steps. Write it out, then let it go completely.
Have it in a place where you can review it every once in a while. This can be an online profile, a word document, printed out on your wall. You don’t need to see it everyday. You just need to have it in the back burner while continually letting go of any attachment to any outcome of “getting” her.
"Okay. I just finished my list a bit ago, and I'm ready to post it. People may be offended by this, but eff you. You can handle it. Keep in mind that over time, as I meet more and more women, my list will most certainly change. Anyway, here's the list as it stands right now:
The title of my Ideal Woman Script:
"My Ideal Woman, who feels able to surrender herself into my Love and feel completely at home with whatever surrounds us."
Be (What She IS): Confident, Passionate, Sexy, Intelligent, Well-Read, Compassionate, Sexual, Independent, Ticklish, Shorter than Me, Kinky, Physically Fit, Laid back, Full of Love, Open to New Experiences, Dark-haired, Dark-eyed, energetic, playful, competetive, Yin.
Do (What She CAN and LOVES to DO): Read, Yoga, play video games with me, be willing to teach and learn, experiment in bed, cook for me (and vice versa), explore other spiritual realms, experience Tantra, have multiple orgasms (or develop the capability to), give great head, travel with me, watch terrible movies, make out (a lot), find a third for occasional playdates, Open with me in Love.
Have (What She HAS): A great ass, a steady job, fiery passion, high sex drive, bisexual tendencies, Love for life, Love for Me, Clean and Smooth skin, cool social circles that mesh with my own, a sharp wit, healthy cynicism, a broad musical palate, a broad cuisinary palate, the ability to Open to new experiences easily.
So that's the list. I figured the best way to figure out what I want is to write it down exactly. People asked me to post it, and if you've got thoughts, questions, whatever, I'll respond as quickly and as kindly as possible.
Expect that Vipassana post soon. It's coming, I swear. Maybe I'll release it in one hour chunks, like
bafadam 's Dark Tower podcasts. :P